Author: Elegant Me

(Fiction) I’ve decided not to run anymore. I’m standing and facing the truth of who I am. I am bitter, angry, disappointed and hurt. These are not new feelings. I have bee collecting them and storing them for a rainy day. I did not realize that these feelings were slowing rusting my soul, infecting me from within. I’ve waited too long, wasted too much time. I wanted to be in charge of this one part of me. I was ready to give you everything but this. I thought if there’s anything I could handle this was it. Yet here I am. Humiliated, back with a tail between my legs. She was allowed to ramble on and on for about an hour and before a response was given. She stood up and left the room without so much as a good night. The pain of seeing her suffer was unbearable. To think she was choosing pain over comfort was crushing. “Come back! I'm here for you!” She was gone… Everything has fallen apart. It feels like a hurricane was here and turned my life upside down. Everything I was holding together is scattered around and the roof that was covering my dignity is gone. I am exposed I never felt more naked in my life. What am I going to do? She began to weep. She wept uncontrollably for hours. “I need a plan, please!” She hollered. “I have a plan!” before the plan was announced she continued weeping louder as she indulged in more and more self-pity. She wept until she fell asleep. How much longer? I’m so tired. I’ve cried so much that my soul is exhausted. What am I going to do? I don’t know what to do. So please tell me what to do…  She bowed her head and waited this time, the answer...

The San Diego Zoo found out that Cheetahs are very nervous animals and that in order for them to be comfortable they are paired up with dogs from a young age. I saw the cute photos of Cheetahs and their dog buddies and the Instagram comment section was filled with Oohs and Awes...

Some people are takers. No matter how much you give them, they'll still come back for more. They take material things, and they take spiritual things. Some takers know they're takers and they revel in their ability to take. Others don't realise it they surround themselves with givers unconsciously because being around givers gives them a sense of power. I'm talking about Spiritual power also known as vibes or energy. Whether the takers around you take consciously or unconsciously, it still affects you in the same way. This is it's important to know some of the tactics used by takers so that you can protect yourself: They will make mean jokes about you to make you feel bad. They will ask you personal questions so they can use this information against you at a later time. They can't wait to tell you, tragic news so they can see the pain in your eyes. They will pressure you into making decisions leaving you little to no time to decide what is best for you. They're passive aggressiveness and will not confront the situation head-on, but instead, they'll make sure you pay one way or another. You can protect yourself by either cutting these people off. Limit the time you spent with them. As well as taking care of yourself first. Know that you cannot pour from an empty cup. I've said this before in my other posts you need a spiritual practice. Meditate on scripture this is a sure way to fill you up and to make sure you're not pouring from an empty cup. Takers have positive attributes too, and this can feel confusing that's why you need to love them from a distance. I have so much to talk about on this topic. Let me know in the comments below if you want me to add an extended piece on this subject....

Every day presents you with an opportunity to be inspired. To keep going to keep pushing. ‘TD jakes always says never despise the days of small beginnings" this lesson is presenting itself to me in many different forms lately.  Last night I went to DJ Black Coffee’s show here in Toronto, and the whole venue was filled up with the most diverse group of people. I started asking people in the crowd how they know him. The stories where amazing! This one girl said you know he lost feeling in his arm when Nelson Mandela came out of prison and this car ran into a crowd of people? One other guy turns around says “Oh his has been underground for years! Won several awards.” I knew these stories about him but hearing them from people of different races and creed inspired me to not limit myself to a particular audience but to broaden my thoughts concerning who I write for. The lesson is he has been underground in Europe and North America for years, and now only his getting the mainstream attention. Imagine the perseverance and consistency it took for him to be where he is today. Now I am more inspired to improve as a writer and be consistent and persevere during my underground time. If that African child can, so can I, so can you.     ...

One of my wonderful readers a bright young lady whose strength and wisdom I admire suggested this website be more than boys and fashion. Hi Puveri! 😊 That we should talk more about things like Education. I’ve been having trouble tackling this topic, where do I start? What do I say that hasn’t been said yet? As an educator myself, I have a perspective that is traditional I suppose, and that may come off as clichéd. So, I intend to bring a fresh approach to this immensely huge topic by simplifying it in my natural writing style. We all have heard the question “What do you want to be when you grow up?” the lucky few knew exactly what to say. They said it and then became it. The rest of us chose the most impressive answer you could find to please the adult who was asking you this question (sadly an adult who still doesn’t know what to become. I'm being shady 😊). I had no clue what I wanted to become, so my Mom literally filled out my application to go to Teachers College “She said just do this for now until you decide what to do next”. Even though I wasn’t so passionate about my career choice AT FIRST. I learned a lot. I learned to think critically, to plan, to be professional. I learned about myself. My strengths and my weaknesses. My point is in an educational environment, you learn more than your coursework. I support formal education wholeheartedly. It’s a sure way to have a stable foundation.  However, people are different, and that’s ok. Some people learn better in an informal setting. Some prefer self-teaching. There are a lot of self-taught makeup artist I know if you combine that with a series of short business courses...

I went to get my hair coloured yesterday. I wanted a big bold red! I sat in the chair, and this lady did her thing, in between asking for the opinion of another hairdresser. Now you know that can't be good. Your hairdresser asking for a second opinion! The Color came out bad. I wanted tones and highlights. If the colour had come out flat, I would have maybe kept it. Not only did it come out flat there were patches of black and patches of way too red. I was upset. The hairdresser, the barber and some patrons tried their best to console me and convince me that I looked amazing. I was so angry I left, stopped by the drug store and picked up black dye and coloured my hair the same day even though it was highly not recommended by the clerk at the drug store. What is the purpose of all this talk you ask? The purpose is to tell you no matter how much anyone tells you that something is good for you, for your life if you feel that it's not then it's not. All the answers for our lives are inside us. If you're asking everyone around you what you should do, what you should wear, what you should study, You're doing it all wrong. I always know when I look good when I look good in an outfit. I know, and the mirror knows and my soul dances with excitement and satisfaction. I believe every decision concerning our lives should make your souls dance. You should be so, ok with it that you don't have to wait for anyone to cosign it. It shouldn't matter if someone thinks its the best one yet or not a good one at all. On my Instagram page @elegant_quotess I made this quote: "Not everyone will...

Letting go of a situation or person that hurt you is easier said than done. I've always thought that I was supposed to just decide to let go and poof! It was done. So I'd beat myself up when I woke up the next day, and the feeling of anger and bitterness was still there. Why can't I just let it go? Cos I thought that as soon as I decide to let it go. It'll all go away. I'd be wiped clean with zero residues. That's not the case at all. Letting go is a  process. Its deciding every day, every hour, every minute, and every second that I will not let myself dwell on this negative thought that is hurting me. It's admitting to yourself that "yes this hurts!" but I'm not going to spend my time meditating on the pain. The previous blog " You are meditating on that? "touched lightly on the power of meditation. Rather meditate on what you're grateful for, on scripture and whatever else floats your boat. I hope this was helpful.  ...

I went to the drug store yesterday in search of facial cleanser, and I came across this Neutrogena cleanser on sale. Neutrogena is that brand that Kerry Washington advertises "Can your makeup remover do all that? Neutrogena"  I just love how she speaks. She has this innocent way of speaking like a lisp but not really. Anyway according to the label the cleanser minimizes the appearance of pores. I walked over to that makeup mirror to look at my pores, shrugged and bought the cleanser. I guess my pores could be smaller, right? I've used it once so far, and I love it. While in the bathroom I started to check for my pores, you know to see if they had gotten smaller. I then realised wait a minute I had no issue with the size of my pores until I went to the drug store. So I did what I normally do when I need answers, I Googled  "Why do I need to minimize my pores?" Guess what no reason at all. Just a bunch of advertisers telling you, you need to have smaller pores, and to have smaller pores, you have to buy their product. Corporations are making tons of money off of our insecurities and until we develop a sense of high intrinsic security in who we, they'll continue to exploit us. It's not my first time speaking on these matters see my article Body Image as well. Cheers!...

I get it; social media is the millennial's absolute fav past time. We are moving from snap chat to Instagram and Twitter with a click of a button. Memes are my absolute favourite, and I'm actually trying to introduce a new post on here called  Meme of the day. I find myself laughing outrageously in public because of memes. I'm a blogger, so I'm not about to exclude myself from this madness. I've been noticing a lot of memes that actually are not ok to our mental health, and they are written in a funny, jokey way, so we don't pay attention to the detrimental effect they have on our emotional strength. For example: "My Milkshake brings all the emotionally unavailable, narcissistic, selfish, commitment-phobes to the yard." This is a meme that's supposed to be funny, and we laugh and keep swiping after hours of scrolling you don't realise you're letting this junk into your subconscious mind. Are you meditating on that? Soon you'll start believing you attract these kinds of people that you're broke and have anxiety. Once you believe it, you speak it and this How about this: "How broke are you? McDonald's ice cream machine." Whatever you spend your time thinking about, joking about, reading about is who you become. Many thought leaders know this. Many self-help books will tell you this as well. There is power in your thoughts. I find that going offline real helps. I take a week sometimes just one day without social media. Whats fantastic is that every time I take time off, and I feel like swiping, I take a moment to pray or meditate on my favourite verse this helps me to ground me in my faith and replaces the negative thoughts with positive ones, and I guarantee it'll work for you too.  Of course, there are positive aspects of social media we get to share knowledge, interact with people far across the globe. Be mindful of what you're allowing into...

My face is hot with rage, and I'm slowly losing respect for this older African man I work with.  How dare he? As he kept talking, my anger slowly begins to subside because we are having a conversation that has needed to be had for ages. His telling me about his friends who's got two wives here in Canada! One lives on the 10th floor and one on the 17th. I ask Fahad, how his friends supporting two women. Fahad's says "they both work and help him, his a wealthy man." I realized my questions is very ignorant because I assumed that just because the culture they're practicing is ancient doesn't mean that they don't have modern practices. Like women being bread winners, and I'm also acutely aware of how this combination of cultures is benefiting Fahad's friend and men like him more than the women involved. I tell Fahad that most African cultures are made to benefit men. He argues that these women choose this lifestyle as he tries to make his point, I'm immediately brought back to my own culture were in the "olden days" a first wife was given the option to choose and propose to the second wife. Fahad says in his community, more and more young women are choosing to marry older men because they are mature and they can provide emotional, financial and spiritual support. He says women offer to let their husbands marry a second wife because they say "It's better this way, at least you won't cheat on me" I say Fahad but don't you see! That's part of the problem! They're not exactly saying I'm happy with it, or seeing you with someone else's makes me feel good this is saying, either way, I'm screwed, and this is the better option of screwed for me! As I...